Monday, August 4, 2008

Finding Lily's Wings

I hope you can hear the song that is playing now on our blog. It has been a favorite of mine for a long time. The first time I heard it, we were waiting on Lily. I quickly raced to the computer to print off the lyrics for Lily's journal. If I could write a song for her that would include all of my wishes and prayers for her life- it would be this song. I put this song on my playlist today because it fits what is about to take place in our lives in one more day. I have been blessed to spend a little over 4 months with Lily, but I am returning to my job on Wednesday. Of course, I am leaving Lily in the care of her wonderful, amazing Aunt Mindy. I know that this is all part of God's plan, but I am really sad knowing how many things I will miss each day with Lily. Yet, I am still reminded of how thankful I am that God planned our adoption at the perfect time of the year. He made sure that I would be able to take off the rest of the year and have a beautiful summer with my daughter. In a few more days, Lily will begin her first journey of finding her own wings. At the same time, I guess I get to figure out how to keep planting the seeds that will grow into her roots. Please say a prayer for both of us over the course of the next few weeks. I am sure her adjustment period will be much easier than mine. I never imagined returning to work would be quite this difficult. However, I do still love and appreciate my job. I also look forward to taking Lily to school with me. That will only be in 3 more years, and I am sure time will fly by just as it has over the past 4 months.

4 comments:

Aimee D said...

oh stephanie I totally know what you are going through. that first time I had to go back when I had my little guy was so hard but you know you are right...God's timing is so perfect and so good and Lily and you will do beautifully! Hope you have a smooth and wonderful start to your year!

lillian08 said...

Oh Stephanie...
It will be truly difficult to go back to work and let Lily "have wings", but Lily will be overcome with joy and excitement when you pick her up after school! I'm not going to lie to you... it's hard at first, but IT DOES GET EASIER WITH TIME!! I promise!
I'll be praying for your peace and Lily's smooth transition! (((HUGS)))
Love you,
Jen

Anonymous said...

Steph,

It's still hard for me to leave my babies every year. I started school Friday. AND next Wednesday Merrell will start kindergarten!! I'll get to drop her off everyday, but she's so grown!!! I was shopping last week for her supplies and when I got the last thing, I got all teared up because putting the last thing in the basket made her officially READY for school.... I used to laugh at my mother for stuff like this.

Kelley

Anonymous said...

Dear Stephanie,

I feel your anxiousness and turmoil. You have had a great time to bond with Lily and she knows the love of her family to her core. I wish I could say I have forgotten the pain of leaving Chase- but it is still there. HOWEVER, God has shown me that for each step that Chase has taken 'without me' firmly planted by his side that HE has been there all along to catch him if he falls. As my "baby" is STILL struggling to make his decision to go to the high school or stay at the jr. high (mind you we have 24 hours left to make that decision) I can relate. As mothers we just want to take away all the changes and obstacles that our children must overcome. But I have learned by doing that I am robbing him of his chance to step out in faith and trust what God is doing for him. I know that our children are in two totally different spots in their lives- but I do think in a way this applies to your Lovely Lily also. I saw a saying that I copied off and placed on my desk- it really spoke to me as I began to understand that I was making a mistake in trying to take all the mountains and valleys out of Chase's life (which is IMPOSSIBLE-but I was still trying). The saying that I am trying to adhere to is: "Prepare your child for the road- not the road for your child!" Know in your heart that you have done ALL you can do to prepare Lily Grace for her upcoming journey and watch as God starts working even MORE miracles in ALL of your lives! You will be in my prayers!

Stacie